Remember when Demna dropped these and suddenly everyone's feet looked like they were cosplaying as Herman Munster? The Steroid Derbys aren't just chunky shoes—they're practically performance art for your feet.

That fully molded EVA construction is giving serious "I could walk through the apocalypse and still make it to the afterparty" vibes. The exaggerated volume is doing precisely what Balenciaga does best—making you question everything you thought you knew about proportions while simultaneously making every other shoe in your closet look tragically pedestrian.

The extra round toe creates that perfect "my footwear has its own gravitational pull" energy that's become Demna's signature move. That 20mm platform? Just enough elevation to make sure everyone knows you paid luxury prices to look like you're wearing orthopedic footwear—the ultimate fashion flex.

Four-eyelet lace-up situation keeps these firmly in the derby category while the tonal Balenciaga logo on the tongue whispers rather than shouts "I spent half my rent on these and regret nothing." Made in Italy because of course they are—Balenciaga may be trolling the industry, but they're doing it with impeccable craftsmanship.